[tmtranscripts] Spokane TeaM 1-27-01, Part 2

[ZooidODell at aol.com]

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THOROAH:  I don't know if Gerdean's question about perfection hunger turning 
into perfectionism has been fully addressed or not. 

PAULO:   I can only ascertain that if I get a report from Gerdean herself.  
I'll step aside in order for her to respond.

GERDEAN: I think that the conversation from the first entity ....
GINNY: Who was that, by the way?
GERDEAN: It was a feminine presence.  I don't know –
GINNY:   I thought maybe it was Nebadonia, but ...
GERDEAN: .... but she spoke of Nebadonia ...
GINNY: Yeah.
GERDEAN: ... as being someone aside from herself.  I had a hard time 
recognizing her as someone that I have transmitted before, and so I only knew 
it as a feminine adjunct of the Divine Minister.  And I'm pleased that she 
discussed the Mother thing, but I don't necessarily equate that as having 
addressed the question of perfection.  I guess I had an interest to know 
about the admonition to be perfect versus perfectionism.  So no, I don't 
think it's been addressed.

GINNY: Well, you know, to me, that admonition is tough, unrealistic.  On this 
plane anyhow, because it won't -- in fact, we're going to be imperfect for a 
very long time.  All along our route from now til we reach Paradise, we're 
going to be imperfect and we will make mistakes and make blunders and be 
reprimanded and be ...  In your example, in that office situation, it seems 
like you were reminded by another person that you were imperfect, and your 
judgment is that you did the best you could; you really thought you handled 
the situation in a thoughtful way.  So I think our own judgment is far more 
important than what other people say about us, but I think it's really hard 
not to be affected by other people's opinions.  I'm just beginning to ... 
just ... not ignore, but not really take to heart too many criticisms by 
other people but myself because they're not in the situation, but very often 
people are responding from their own problems and not from the fact that you 
have made a mistake.  

But, going back to perfection and imperfection, I keep thinking that the mota 
"Impatience is a spirit poison ..."--  how being impatient with ourselves 
when we do make mistakes, is really poisonous.  That's a strong word! So I 
think maybe we need to think more of practicing patience with our 
imperfections than trying to become perfect.  I think becoming perfect is the 
eventual goal but I don't think it's meant to be, you know, that we're going 
to get anywhere near it here.  It's all relative.  Perfect and imperfect.  I 
think our greater lesson is learning to be patient with ourselves when we do 
make mistakes and using it as a tool, using it as a lesson.

GERDEAN: I do remember reading in our study about divinity, about the 
relative degrees of perfection and imperfection and how it's all a perception 
– and it's certainly an imperfect world we live in, but still, the Father has 
said, "Be ye perfect in your realm as I AM in mine" so that ...

THOROAH: Maybe we should get an explanation of that again, because I think 
that that should not be a manta for us.

GERDEAN: Yeah, I think you're right because we confuse it with perfectionism.
THOROAH: We don't know what perfect is
GINNY: Yep.

THOROAH:  We have an idea of what we think perfect is and that is not what He 
meant.  I would like to see if Paulo could talk about that.

GINNY: Maybe we could look up in the Concordex, in the Urantia Book, what it 
says about perfection.

GERDEAN: Okay.

GINNY: And I think one other thing we have to do is learn to distinguish – I 
think a lot of bad behavior is simply learned behavior.  It's conditioned 
behavior.  From our upbringing.

GERDEAN: What does that mean -- "bad behavior"?

GINNY: Well, rudeness or hurting somebody's feelings or, you know, talking 
too much or any – I'm talking about acts of rudeness; I'm not talking about 
extreme violence, but any of our ... being too neat or too sloppy or too loud 
or too quiet or too critical or too hurtful or whatever.  So much of that is 
learned behavior from our upbringing, but I think we need to – as I said – 
be very patient with ourselves and try to understand that a lot of that 
behavior is conditioned and a lot of it comes out before we know it.  So 
we're not totally giving full permission or full cooperation in, because I 
know sometimes when I say something I so sorry.  A second after I open my 
mouth I realize that I shouldn't have said it that way but it came out that 
way. Now it wasn't meant to hurt anybody but it just came out and my 
intentions were misunderstood.  I didn't mean it the way somebody else took 
it.  So ... 

And I'm trying to see how much of my behavior is from my conditioning and 
simply trying to forgive myself and be patient with myself and to recognize 
and realize that's probably where it came from and I don't have – it wasn't 
with my full cooperation, in a sense that conditioning really is in our way a 
lot.  I'm not excusing bad behavior because of that but the more I hear about 
bad behavior, anybody's bad behavior, it's just – look at our discussion of 
Judas or Hitler or any of those people, what kind of a – how they were 
brought up or what kind of behavior they saw in their upbringing.  You know, 
we are conditioned.  I think it's very hard to get beyond that. 

PAULO: As you say, Thoroah, it is hard for an imperfect creature to actually 
appreciate a clear appreciation of perfection, for it will be "different 
strokes for different folks" and what may be perfect to one is abhorrent to 
another.  What we're talking about in terms of perfection, "be ye perfect," 
is not in manifestation so much as in purpose of mind.   Your T/R here is 
uncomfortable with the mechanical response I would give, bearing on 
mechanical devices offering fidelity.  

Your perfection begins within your own will and in the development of the 
evolving soul which you may regard as a perfect product of your will and the 
divine will; thus your soul is a perfect reality, but how your soul manages 
to project itself, given the experience of life on your world, it may not at 
all be presented as it is perceived.  So I discuss diffused radio waves, 
diffraction of light, or whatever can be applied to help you appreciate that 
even within your own microcosm of reality your Core in your central isle is 
all perfect as it is, even relatively.  And as it grows it develops and 
acquires greater perfection.  

But how you portray your soul will be received dependent upon how your 
reality is appreciated by another; thus your soul's expression may be 
perceived as a perfect reflection of truth, beauty and goodness or it may  be 
perceived as unreal and therefore not received at all, but this does not mean 
that you quit attempting to portray your soul's reality while your 
environment remains wavering and unstable as far as a pattern of perfection 
is concerned.

Take heart in Stillness, in that place, that citidel, where you perchance may 
absolve yourself of any blame of being less than perfect, there where you are 
embraced by your greater Reality and made part of the whole.  But understand 
that in your attempts to reveal this inner life, you will find yourself in a 
shadow land, like looking underwater gives a sense of instability, but you 
know you are well anchored in righteousness to the extent that your will is 
devoted to doing His will and you have learned how to do that sufficient as 
to truly reflect your perfection in your realm as he perfects his on high, 
which philosophically speaking, you could also construe that Our Father is 
not yet complete, therefore in a growing condition.  Does that mean because 
God the Absolute is not complete that the Universal Father is less than 
perfect? 

THOROAH: Just not completely.
PAULO: Just less than complete, correct.  And therefore when you assess your 
mind, your inner action with your universe, your realm, you can acknowledge 
your contribution as based on the fact that you are indeed perfect, as yet 
incomplete.  It is the imperfect part of you that objects when someone points 
out that you are less than perfect, because that which knows it is incomplete 
is crying for completion.  And so it's a mere reflection of yearning to be 
fulfilled.  It therefore becomes a prayer.  You can regard your yearnings and 
frustrations for greater reality as a prayer, providing you continue to apply 
yourself and strive for a fruition for yourself and for your brothers and 
sisters in their attempts to conform their imperfect will to the perfect will 
of the Father in heaven also.

Yet realize your mutual striving for perfection is non-competitive; it is 
only the human element of you that compares your degrees of perfection.  Your 
soul is merely gratified by finding itself reflected in the souls of those 
you encounter, as you all learn how to relinquish that which no longer serves 
in the face of that which will be you for eternity.  I will not simply brush 
this off as experiential living.  It is the grist of life as you life it.  
There is nothing trivial about a friendship with divinity, even finding it in 
your fellows.  It is truly a sacred undertaking to let down the walls that 
separate you so that you can in trust and in faith embrace in the spirit. It 
is our holy grail.  
It is in this that Jesus had such faith in his fellows.  He knew they were 
mortally imperfect but it was true too that he could see the soul of those 
who followed him and those he met and it was in faith of that inner 
configuration of reality that will not fail, that he could place such great 
faith in; and all of you have it.  All of you have a piece of it, already 
perfect if you would but acknowledge that and expand your life from there.  
Alright?

THOROAH: Thank you.

PAULO: You cannot overlook your practice of sitting with God in Stillness, in 
listening for his response to your soul.  This is where you gain strength.  
This is where you harness the energy.  This is where you combat lethargy and 
despair.  This is where enthusiasm is born.  This is the Source and Center of 
who you are.  The reality of that which will realize itself in eternity and 
which even today in the muck and mire of material existence can shine forth 
as a bright light revealing a path through the darkness.  Shine on, 
fireflies.  Shine on.

THOROAH:    I have a question that – it's possible that sciatica is related 
to buried anger.
PAULO: One moment.