[tmtranscripts] Welmek, April 18, 2002

[Donna DIngillo]

WELMEK-COMPANIONSHIP
April 18, 2002

This is your friend and teacher Welmek.  I am pleased to be here this
evening and am glad we have an intimate gathering this evening.  So
perhaps your questions may be a little more of a personal nature if you
are so willing.  

Tonight I have selected the subject of companionship as the topic.  We
spoke of the nature of forgetfulness; do you recall? And now I wish to
engage in the next level of self-forgetfulness, which leads you into
deeper levels of companionship with your brothers and sisters.  For it is
in this relationship that you grow with your brethren, that you are
deepening the connection above of friendship with them that fills your
life with a sense of purpose and connectivity that is so important to the
growing personality development.  You know full well that you are social
creatures, do you not?  And as social creatures you must be in
relationship with other people to fulfill these needs.  However, of the
relationships that you are in; how many could you truly say are deeply
satisfying and immensely rewarding from the standpoint that you can share
you innermost self with these individuals and feel that they can share
their selves with you in an environment of unconditional respect,
affection and to an extent, understanding?  I would like you to pause for
a moment and think about this.  Would you say that the majority of your
relationships fall into this category?

Student:  Welmek, for me, I enjoy, I mean truly enjoy this, for me is my
real wealth.  This above all I am proud of and happy about, is the people
I have known.  My sister since I was born.  Tim and Shirley since I was
in college forty-some years.  Two ladies for almost thirty years, a
recent friend, a dancing partner for two and a half to three years.  Some
other male friends over twenty years.  And I can say in most of these
cases that it is still, this friendship is still growing.  And then, also
happy to have about fifty-some people I relate to in terms of, you might
say business and things.  So I feel my life is wonderfully full that way.

Welmek:  Yes, it is indeed one of life's joys to have a circle of people
around you who know you and love you.  But I am now speaking of the most
intimate and loving of relationships, that deep companionship that is of
a nature that goes beyond just the friendship; it is as if you are
soul-buddies, to use one of your words.  Would you say that you have
relationships of that nature?

Student:  Very much so!  I must show my sister, absolutely.  My friends,
Tim and Shirley, these transcend time and space.  We are together.  Two
ladies; one I was married to for awhile and just in the last three or
four years has made so much, such enormous spiritual, soul growth, just
in deciding to live, coming out of drug addiction and absolute, absolute
devastation; physical and mental and spiritual devastation.  And being a
friend to this person and giving this person someone to relate to so she
wouldn't be institutionalized or dead and seeing her grow and being
absolutely thrilled, leaving her in spite of the wreck she is, to see
this courage to come awake and continue to live.  Another lady I was with
for ten years; we are still absolutely together, even though there was an
enormous kind of rejection because we didn't get back together as lovers
and that but stayed really true friends.  Welmek, I don't know any
boundaries on these relationships.   

Welmek:  And what do you say that, in these relationships, you find it
easy to be in that state of self-forgetfulness and just sharing who you
are, the beauty of your personality, the joy of being together and the
pleasure that you have in discovering who these people are?  

Student:  Welmek, you know, to me the signature of these friendships is
that it's a mystery.  I don't why. I really don't know why I am happy
just to see them or to hear from them, but I am, it's a spontaneous thing
and it's something inexplicable and just, just so joyful for that very
reason.

Welmek:  There is a deep level of exploration that comes in knowing
another person.  It is as if you are discovering aspects of the Father
Himself.  And I say to you that there is joy, there is adventure, there
is exhilaration and immense freedom as you learn who another person is in
your life and how you can continue to unfold in your personality sharing
together that leads you to new associations and deeper communal
expressions of the Fathers' love within your bonded and unified
relationship. 

Student:  Welmek, I thank you for this insight because I do not naturally
think of this as; I think I mentioned this to you before, and it just is
what I was talking to with D a little bit ago.  I don't naturally think
of this as coming from a personality, in other words, the Father's
nature.  And I enjoy that perspective, I like the feel of it.  It's just
to me still a bit beyond my comprehension that this comes as a source; to
me it's something surrounding me, it's part of me, so I don't see it as
other.  And in that I'm probably not entirely mistaken but to see it as a
source, outside of myself, is a new perspective.

Welmek:  It is a source outside of you and it is a source inside of you. 
It is both.  And it is difficult at your level to extricate that which is
external and that which is internal.  And I would even say that it is not
even necessary to know that which is outside and that which is within. 
The important concept of conveyance in this discourse this evening is to
help you understand that the nature of companionships is important to
your spiritual development and also to help you understand a deeper level
of why these companionship relationships are important than you have
perhaps considered before.  This is why I often ask you to share with me
so that I can lead you to an insight that will add another dimension in
your own internal environment.  The idea of growing these friendships and
adding to the companionship quotient in your life is so important because
in the actual bond that you share with another person, you find a level
of love and peace and togetherness and this is all a part and parcel of
who the Father is and how the universe is glued together with these
relationships and how nothing can exist without these relationships.  And
what you are doing my friend is, you are adding a level of enjoyment and
experience into the evolving Supreme Being, that is God experiencing life
through you.  Do you understand?  

Student:  Very much, Welmek!  This is where I agree that it's not
important to make a certain distinction of other and self, because in one
way there is a profound oneness, a union as the absolute reality; we in
our little beginning stage here, even participate in.  One of the most
wonderful things that stuck with me and found resonance in my living mind
of the words in the Urantia Book is when it pointed out most physical
things, even things like, living things, like food and shelter, in a way
they are a means to an end, but our relationships, our companionships
with other persons are an end in themselves.  In that sense they are
outside of time, they do not exist so that we can get something in the
future; they are now.  I was really thrilled with that insight from the
text.

Welmek:  They are part and parcel of the Father.  They are the expression
of the Father in each of you as you move and grow and experience your
relationship.  They are eternal; they are existential, and you my friend
have the exquisite joy of sharing in this most wonderful and blessed of
all experiences; to have companionship with another individual that will
lead you to deeper levels of understanding the Father.  There is so much
beauty and grandeur in these relationships.  The more you amass your
friendships at this deeper spiritual level, the more joy and love you
will experience and the more you will forget about what it is that you
need and what it is that you expect in life and find that your true joy
comes just in being with good friends and sharing the love of the Father
that is growing and bonding you together.  

Student:  Thank you Welmek for being another dear friend.

Welmek:  I echo that sentiment to you my brother.

Student:  Yes, Welmek, this is D.  This is a difficult one for me in the
sense of; I really don't have any true friends that I could call my soul
buddies.  Although I am experiencing the opening or the promising of a
companionship with a woman at this time and we do talk to each other
about our spiritual life and what's going on in our lives.  And there is
love between us, and so that is promising and has potential to be quite
rewarding and rich.  I do have people such as D. and E., who I confide in
about what's going on in my life, the innermost parts of my life.

But maybe it's part of my personality or makeup that I've never really
had a true friend during my childhood we traveled around a lot, so we
moved every two years, so I was never really established any deep
long-lasting friendships.  And I've always envied people who stayed in
one place and had a best friend for life.  So I've always been kind of a
solitary person and I don't feel lonely, although there are times where I
do feel alone for romantic purposes.  But my children are my friends as
well.  I don't necessarily confide every single thing to them, as they
don't with me, but I consider them my soul mates as well; and there is a
lot of love between us, obviously.

But one of my regrets is like with my mother, I could never confide in
her my deepest innermost secrets.  And there's always that barrier
between us, that I can't be totally myself.  So I'm kind of like the
opposite of J., that I don't have that whole network of friendship, of
soul mates, but I'm more of a solitary person.  

Welmek:  Would you say that in the relationships that you have do you
find that your soul is at rest when you are with these individuals?

Student:  I would say yes.  Like I am creating a community with the
church that I'm participating in and my soul's at rest with D. and E. and
this woman that I am seeing, and her children.  But I am experiencing
great unrest with the person that's living with me, and it's causing me
great discomfort. 

Welmek:  There are two elements I would like to address here.  One is the
idea of being a companion to someone and this level of relationship
usually is one of reciprocity where neither individual feels that it is
necessary to offer advice or guidance or support.  It is a level of
enjoyment and I would even call it service of just sharing who you are
and letting the other person express himself or herself to you and
allowing the union of your souls to blend together and fill you with
peace and satisfaction.  There is a delightful self-forgetfulness that
occurs in this relationship for do you not find that the time passes
quickly, and that you feel uplifted, and that it is an enjoyable
experience that when you leave the encounter you feel good and it was
something that you look forward to experiencing again and again. 
(Student: Yes)  

This is one level that I am suggesting. If you do experience this then,
this level of companionship that I am suggesting is what is so satisfying
in human experience.  There are those relationships that are more, I
would say, service oriented where you are forgetting yourself and putting
the needs of another person in front of yours.  This is best epitomized
in the parent-child relationship and you know full well what that entails
from your relationship with your children.  

But in this relationship of the person that is now living with you, I
would ask you to consider what kind of relationship do you think this
will be for you, one of a companionship nature, or one of a service
nature - of parent-child.  Do you have any confusion in your mind about
this, or are you perhaps being torn in two different directions in your
own mind?

Student:  I know I'm being torn.  I know I'm feeling, I don't feel joy,
I've even felt betrayed by some of his actions or words he has said.

Welmek:  Is it because you are looking for a certain level of
understanding from him in yourself?  (Student: Possibly?)  And if this is
so, then I suggest that you take a closer look at this individual and ask
for insight into this person's motivations and behavior, for it could be
that you are mixing to a certain extent what it is that this relationship
is about.  He is a very emotionally young, is he not?  (Student:  Yes,
very much so.)  And so in that youthfulness you can see that there is
more of the child in him, and as a person who is more emotionally stable
and mature this would lend itself to the parent-child relationship
inasmuch as you do not expect that child to understand you, but you
provide guidance and assistance to that person so they can learn a better
way, they can learn some of the boundaries that are necessary in
interpersonal relationships that will give them a better sense of
self-discipline and respect for others. 

Student:  What happens if he's not open to doing that?

Welmek:  But it is not a matter of you portraying this in an overt
fashion.  It is a subtle and I would say, inspired approach on your part
by going to Michael and saying,  "Michael, this person is now in my home,
and it is to some extent my responsibility to care for this individual. 
Teach me the ways of being a good parent-friend to this person that will
not make him feel threatened or insignificant but will teach him those
skills that he now needs to live life more independently and successfully
on his own."  And perhaps in time, when he grows and develops more, you
will have forged a deeper level of relationship that affords you this
level of companionship/reciprocity that we were discussing.  Does this
help?

Student:  Yes, very much so.  You know how painful this has been for me
and how vulnerable I am at this time because of past experiences of the
past five months; which I thank you very much for helping me through. 
You know what happened and everything.  But the other night; he is in the
city right now and supposedly he had some hard problem and so I called
him up late that night, around midnight, and I just said I loved him
very, very much and I said to him, " I know at times I might be hard on
you but it is only because I want you to become self-reliant and grow as
a human being, in spirit".  And then I said a prayer to him.  He seemed
to be thankful for that.  Because I felt all this anguish and pain and
discomfort and then I said to myself, as I was talking to my lady friend,
I said:  "Oh!  How would Jesus see this person?  How would God see this
person?"  So I looked through Jesus' eyes and it all changed.  And I felt
love.  And after I got off the phone with this man, I just started to
cry, for no reason.  Well there was a reason, but I just started crying. 
So I'm trying.

Welmek:  And you are trying very admirably, and you must recognize that
it is not your responsibility to change this person.  Although this
person is in your home and you are trying to offer guidance; you must
also remember that this person is distrustful and has his own unique way
of looking at things that will not match yours at many times.  As a
boarder in your home, you have every right to expect him to consider your
standards, but you must also remember that he is coming from a certain
place of, I will say, a lack of discipline, and he does not at this time
understand or honor your ways to the extent that he will come to
understand in the future.  You must be patient and consistent and most of
all, non-judgmental and he will respond to that.  Does this help?

Student:  Yes, very much so.  My only, my only concern is like; and we'll
move on from this, is that when he does something or doesn't do something
how it affects me, like not showing up for work, or not doing the job
properly so it creates more labor.  And then I'm stuck having to do more
work and other things as well.  

Welmek:  Then you must decide in your own mind if he is a suitable
employee for you, and if not, then to find someone who is and to tell him
what his options are.  These are your choices.  You must set your
standards for your business; and as a smart businessman knows,
unproductive employees only detract from the professional image that you
are trying to present to your clients. 

Student:  I understand.  Thank you very much.

Welmek:  Do you have any comments on the nature of companionship this
evening?

Student:  I don't think so.  I guess it's just my soul's yearning to find
that significant other soul mate to share common vision and spirit with.

Welmek:  I would encourage you to extend this idea of spiritual buddy to
a larger community and to find those individuals with whom you can share
the beauty and integrity of yourself with.  There is no need to hold back
who you are my friend.  You are a beautiful person and have many gifts to
share.  It is the romantic ideal to have this one individual that you can
share yourself with and I am not discounting that, but I am also
encouraging you to be more forthcoming with who you are with other people
now in your sphere.  Let them see the beauty.  Let them see what you have
to give.  Let them come to know you and in that knowing of who you are
they will love you and return love to you. You must make the first step
and let them see you.  There is nothing to hide; you have much beauty and
love to give.  Let them see that and they will respond accordingly. 
(Student:  Thank you.)  

That is the joy of being in companionship with people.  As you exude your
love, your beauty, your personality that comes from the Father -
everything in you that is good, and true, and real - how can other people
not fail to love you and want to know you more?  And so you can never
have too many friends, and you will find that your relationships grow and
deepen.  The more you give of yourself, the more you will find these
deeper levels of companionship.  And this is why self-forgetfulness is so
important to this growing level of companionship, because the more you
show who you are, the more you forget about your worries and your cares. 
And are not these all encumbrances of the ego-self?  Are there any other
comments before we move onto other general questions?  

Student:  Welmek, I don't know if you're in one -way allowed to make a
definitive statement; that's one of my hearts yearnings to meet again
another four or five people that are just so dear and so precious to me
that I've lost track of; and I mean soul-mates in the sense that we
deeply affected each others lives.  The very meaning and value of life
changed because they were in it, that they showed me a whole realm, a
whole dimension of being, just because they were there.  And yet in our
very mobile society, I've lost track of them.  There's a deep inference
in the textbook that these individuals, we will meet them again if we so
desire to.  I would like your comments on what I believe is an inference
I gathered from the text that, if we choose to meet these people somehow
or other there's like a great directory on the Mansion Worlds where you
can look em up.

Welmek:  That which you shared with them was a blending of personality
and a unification of a dimension of the Father.  It is a real bond.  It
is a living entity.  And even though the human mind and the physical body
have been separated by time, in eternity this distance does not exist,
for that union of soul continues, it grows. There is a nourishment that
continues even though you are not in the conscious realm, one with the
other.  And so you have this bond that will never really be broken.  And
so you easily reconnect with them anytime here and now or at some future
point in your eternal career.  It will be easier once you become
morontiaized, for you will not have such distances of physicality and I
would say the word here I would use is mental distance.  For the mind is
truly the realm of the deeper levels of communication that occur at the
spiritual level, and when you are in your new morontia body these
distances will evaporate.  Does this help? 

Student:  Just a consummation, devoutly, to be wished.  Yes!  Yes!  It
occurred to me, Welmek, as your were talking, this is another direction
for prayer.  Some of these dear, sweet people that I've known and lost
track of; just to wish them the best  (tape is turned over) 

Welmek:  (Probable words of Welmek: When you send your greetings) to them
and your well wishes and your desires for them.  Know that they will be
delivered to the appropriate individuals, and who knows what the outcome
will be?  But you never have to lose contact, as you say; it is only a
matter of using your mind to transmit those messages that you wish for
them to receive.  Use this circuitry more to your advantage and let them
know that they are in your heart and in your thoughts and they will be
very overjoyed and grateful for that, I am sure.

Student:  Thank you!  Thank you, that to me, this is our real wealth. 
This is our true possession, these infinite other beings we relate to and
enjoy.

Welmek:  The universe is rich in companionship; and as you grow and feel
this family of brothers and sisters about you now, you will find the
blessings within your soul fill you to such exquisite depths and breaths
and heights that the only true expression of your heart will be one of
worshipful gratitude to the Father for making this all possible and real
in your life.  Do you have any other questions before we conclude this
evening?

Student:  Yes Welmek, this is D.  Would it be wise for me to share my
experience of what I experienced over the past five months regarding my
spiritual growth and the court case, with the church, in the near future?
 Because I've had some very trying experiences but also some very
uplifting and faith-evolving experiences.  Would it be OK and uplifting
for other people to hear my story, because it was mind and spirit
altering for me and faith-evolving? 

Welmek:  I would ask you what would be your intention in disclosing this
event to the members of the church?  I would spend some time in stillness
and discussing with Michael and Mother what it is that you would like to
share and what your intention is, and asking for their guidance.  

My personal opinion is not so important only to say that faith stories
are inspiring and they serve to help other people see the way in which
the Father and Michael and Mother work in human life.  And so it is a
valuable experience, but I would also add this cautionary note in the
disclosing, if it is in anyway to unburden yourself, I would spend some
time in stillness and asking Michael and Mother to counsel you on this. 
Does this help?

Student:  Yes, because I was thinking about that, my intent, what is my
intention for wanting to disclose.  

Welmek:  Once you are clear in your intention, I think there will be
little question in your mind then as to which direction you should take. 


Student:  Well, I understand that.  I don't feel so much a desire to
disclose it, as much as I used to.

Welmek:  And then I would say that is a good indicator.

Student:  And one last thing, Welmek.  I've just been feeling a lot of
like physical discomfort over the past three weeks and especially in my
right side of my body.  And it's like it feels like my nervous system and
I don't know if I should go and see a doctor because I'm really resistant
to doing that.

Welmek:  I am not at liberty to advise you as to whether or not to seek
medical help.  I would admonish you to ask yourself these questions: Am I
getting enough rest and properly de-stressing my body?  Am I working too
long or keeping my body too stiff and so that the muscles become sore at
the end of the day?  And am I properly nourishing my body to have the
nutrients it needs to sustain my physical labors?  These are the
questions I suggest you pose to yourself.  

Student:  OK, I know I need a lot of rest right now.  Thank you for your
time.

Welmek:  It is my pleasure to help you. 

Student:  And, I just want to thank you for, like I said, helping me
through, with your guidance the past five, six months.  It felt good to
know that I am being taken care of and watched.

Welmek:  Well, my friend you did have a lot of help, I cannot take much
credit for this, because there were many who were watching over you and
assisting you in this life circumstance.  But I understand what you mean
and I am most grateful to have been able to assist you in this capacity. 
(Student:  Thank you.)

My dear friends, I look forward to the day when we stand face to face and
can greet each other as brothers in the family of Michael and Mother. 
You are near and dear to me and I cherish these times of coming together
in sharing and instruction.  And I so enjoy the faith-adventure that I
see you on.  And you do inspire me because you know not what I know nor
see what I see, yet you have such a tremendous courage of heart and this
touches me greatly and for that I am most humbly appreciative of our
companionship as we grow in love, in beauty and service of the Father. 
Good evening!